It's my birthday and I'll _________ if I want to....

Honestly, birthdays are so confusing.  Once you are too old for miniature golf birthday parties or slumber parties, what to do?  It's always a quandary.  I am always grateful that I am here and alive so there is no dread for that reason, ever.  The dread comes from how to mark the day.  Do I make a big deal about it?  Do I scream it from the top of the mountains?  When the day falls on a weekday, it's always problematic.  If it's just another birthday and not a "big" one, how many celebrations can you have?  

I have friends that are very pro-active about their birthdays and let everyone know way in advance. My former business partner always made a big deal about birthdays (not her own, ever).  We used to joke that the surprise in the "surprise" party was who would show up to celebrate.  Some years were nearest and dearest; other years, who are you? 

The problem may be the indecisiveness.  Friends and family will ask what do you want to do?  I don't know.  Not being a martyr, just really don't know.  Uncomfortable, maybe, in making it into something big.  Uncomfortable, maybe, not making it into anything. "What do you want for your birthday?" Oh my.  As the years go on, who cares?  If I really want something, I will get it when I need/want it. And yet, getting nothing doesn't work, either.  It's not the same when you are a kid and you want things: Barbies, roller skates, basketballs, Monopoly.  That is a piece of cake (pun intended). As we get older, what can you really want?  A night alone away? Alone with your spouse? Breakfast in bed? 

 

Facebook has definitely changed the way birthdays get noticed because any "friend" gets an alert that it is a birthday.  It actually makes it easier for everyone.  Gone are the days of cards in the mail.  Emails and FB birthday wishes abound.

When I was younger, there were definitely people in my life that I felt needed to/should remember my birthday.  Not a long list. When my paternal grandmother died, I realized so did the birthday wishes and gifts.  I never imagined that my grandfather didn't know the day.  He only had two grandchildren.  Just not on his list of priorities.  That was his wife's job.  The realization was a touch surprising.  

So as another birthday is upon me, I am going to root for my daughter's volleyball team and am thankful for every year and every day that I get to appreciate my children, husband, family and friends.